Warning: Long post ahead

I was trying to think of blog post ideas the other day and thought a post about the craziest thing that’s ever happened to me would be pretty good. I had a had hard time trying to figure out what the “craziest thing to ever happen to me was”. I kept thinking of college parties and was like no, that’s not really that crazy. That’s just college. But then I thought about a trip to Chicago that Brandon and I took a couple years ago. It might not be the wildest thing you’ll ever hear, but it was one crazy trip to Chicago. It was like an endless string of events that were just straight bizarre.

So firstly, this trip was already going to be epic because we were hitting the three B’s – Bulls, Bears, and Blackhawks games. To get all those sports in one weekend? Amazing. But it was about to get cray. I hope this sounds as nuts as it felt, otherwise, I’ll just sound lame that this is “crazy” to me… 😉 Want a sneak peek before reading any further? Think tornadoes, sickness, and getting lost in Chicago (in an area you don’t want to be lost in).

Let’s start off with night #1 shall we? Bulls game was up first. It was my first Bulls game as well as my first time in United Center. It was AWESOME. We had really good tickets too!

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Check out those seats! Everything was going perfectly until I started to not feel so great. I thought, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! I never get sick and now here I am at a Bulls game and I’m feeling sick. This is ridiculous. Still an awesome time, but I couldn’t even eat my veggie burger I was so pumped about… That sounds weird, but when you’re from Nebraska, veggie burgers are hard to come by at sporting events. I felt awful though, and I remember riding the bus back downtown and we were all crammed in there and standing and so many stops…and turns…bleh. Just thinking about it makes me sick. So the first night, I was in bed not partying. LAME. That should’ve been the sign of how the rest of the trip would go.

couple-at-united-center

The next day was the other two B’s of the trip: Bears and Blackhawks. When I woke up I felt much better. So that was good. It was in November and I remember waking up to texts about how there was supposed to be severe weather in Chicago. Really odd. But we braved it and made the long trek to Soldier Field. I still wasn’t 100% so seeing NFL fans plastered was not fun. It was my first NFL game, and I’m not sure I liked it because of this experience. I like to party but those fans were nuts. I saw 50 years olds partying harder than I did my freshman year of college. I respect, but dang!

We finally get to the entrance. Nonchalantly the security tells me I can’t have my purse. Um, what? Yeah, I guess at NFL games you can’t bring in purses! You have to put all of your stuff in a clear bag, not concealed. AW HECK NO WAS I GOING TO THROW MY PURSE AWAY. So they give me a big Ziploc bag. I cram all of my stuff in there and Brandon puts my purse in the back his pants. Lol, I wish I was kidding and now he’s probably super embarrassed. But if we took it back to the hotel, there would be no point in even coming back. So here I am carrying around a ziplock bag with all of my things in it and it would barely close. I was not having it. But that was the best part of the game.

We make our way to our seats. They were up pretty dang high which is fine, but I was literally scared of getting hit by a drunk person and falling to my death 40 rows down. This isn’t how I planned to die.

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If you look down the wrong way, you’ve got a one-stop ticket to your plummeting death. P.S. I don’t know how NFL fans don’t die from falling in stadiums.

Here I am facing my optimism and trying to act cool and remind myself it will only get better from here. Also, I still wasn’t feeling good enough to drink–otherwise I would’ve been drinking to make myself feel better.

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While I was busy NFL fan watching and trying to catch glimpses of Michael Oher (they were playing Baltimore), the clouds starting twisting and turning and it got chilly and extremely windy. Next thing, I hear death calling…tornado sirens.

Ah shit.

It was time to retreat to shelter, which there is no “safe” shelter. Have you seen this stadium? The only shelter that’s safe is in the locker room. I honestly felt I was going to die here. We were so high up, there was absolutely no way we were getting down in time. The wind just picked up more, it started raining (it felt like stabbing knives) and here I am clutching onto my Ziploc bag of belongings and trying to get down the stairs to shelter. But alas, everyone is drunk and not moving and being stupid. Literally remember one guy saying something like, “BRING IT, GOD”. Nope. Please don’t “bring it” God. There was a kid having a panic attack and a lady about to pass out. I wish I had a GoPro because it was CRAZY!! You could see things flying around in the stadium in circular motions. I really thought it was the end. After a while, the whole stadium was cleared out except for our section and we had barely moved.

Towards the end I swallowed my pride and thought I don’t even care if I look stupid at this point, I’m getting out of here. So I started hopping rows of seats while saying the Hail Mary in my head. I laugh now because omg, how funny is that scene? I was like, “BRANDON, LET’S GO!!” *while plowing down seats*

We were soaking wet and poor Brandon had to run for his life with my purse smashed into the back of his pants. Hahaha. Classic.

When we finally made it into the flooded bottom (water was practically to my calves), the weather had passed and everyone was crammed.

soldier-field-tornado-warning

EPIC. We did not return back to our seats. I was so over it at that point. I was getting over a rare quick sickness and now here I was soaked and cold walking back to our hotel.

Again, I picked up my optimism and put my positivity pants on and got ready for the Blackhawks game that night. We get on the train and head back down to the United Center. Tonight was my night to redeem myself from the previous evening and party it up like Chicago intended me to the night before.

We get off the train and start walking… It looked different than the night before. There weren’t that many people around. There’s a huge event going on, why aren’t there other people? We first thought the worst, that we got off at the wrong stop. You don’t want to get off at the wrong stop in Chicago by the United Center. (Figured out later, we were about a miles west of the United Center). It really didn’t look shady, though. It actually reminded me of a college neighborhood, not like the bottoms, clazzier even. Then we turn the corner and see a sketchy looking shop with a guy hanging out by the door outside sipping on a bottle with the brown bag.

Being from Omaha, I try not to get worried about a rough part of town. I’m not scared of getting in a bad situation so I stayed calm, but as we kept walking the calm kinda wore off and I was like, Brandon, I think we need to get out of here. Everyone who drove by us would slow down and look. Eek, it was bad. After walking the wrong way for a while, we turned around and found the bus stop (THANK THA LAWD). Our phone told us that the bus was seven minutes away and it was the longest seven minutes of my life.

An older guy walked over to us and was really nice (he could tell we weren’t from there) but then he said, “Y’all be careful, there’re a lot of people trying to get their bread these days around here”. Holy shiz. When he said that, I was just thinking Brandon has no idea what he’s saying, but it’s not good. Lol. We should not be here. So we finally got aboard that bus and made it to the United Center. At this point of my life, I gave zero efs and nothing would get in my way of having fun. I just survived a tornado (sorta) and got lost in a not-so-great part of Chicago. So how do I redeem myself? By getting tipsy at the United Center, of course.

The price of booze at these events are out of control so we did what any other savvy shopper would do. Bring in a couple shooters and crystal light.

Oh, and before I go any further,  I should mention we were sitting all the way in the upper deck.

blackhawks-hockey

AKA far up where we can concoct our beverages in peace and not be worried about getting caught. So we mixed the drinks and enjoyed the atmosphere. I thought, wow, this could really be it…no more weird business going on for me!

Then a couple security guys walked up to our row, looked at me and did that little finger motion to make me get up and come to him.

NO. NO. NO. YOU ARE NOT RUINING THIS FOR ME, SIR. HAVE YOU ANY IDEA WHAT I’VE BEEN THROUGH TODAY!

He points at my pink water and was like ‘what’s this’? (I still can’t believe how calm and collected I was because I can’t lie, I will shrivel up and tell you anything you want to know) But no one was ruining my night. Not even you, Mr. Security Guard. So what do I say? “I mixed crystal light in my water.” “Crystal light?,” confused and not buying it security man says. But I was sticking to it because technically I wasn’t lying. I just didn’t say the other ingredient. Then he goes in for the sniff.

I was just thinking; okay, there’s a 50/50 chance he won’t smell alcohol. 

He gave me a weird look. Then told his other security guard friend, “it’s just water”, and he looked so defeated.

MWAHAHAHA!!! YES!!

But then he still had to smell Brandon’s pop. So it was either a win or a loss. But, he didn’t smell anything peculiar in a 32-ounce cup. HELL. YES.

We got away with it. But also, any chance of a buzz was completely killed because we thought all eyes were on us at all times. Not to mention it was super embarrassing because everyone around us watched it all go down, though the guy behind us told us later the security guards should mind their own bizness. But wanna know why they came up and pulled us aside? Supposedly there are hidden cameras up at the top watching the crowd and they saw me put powder (crystal light) in my bottle and shake it. Apparently that could be how a bomb is made. According to the United Center security. So they thought I was a legit threat.

Welp, United Center, I’m no threat to you. I was just a kid trying to have some fun after an insane weekend of events. Also, to be clear – Crystal Light got me in trouble. Not a shooter.

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We spent the rest of our last night in the Windy City feeling both blessed and destroyed. #Blessed because we survived and didn’t get kicked out of the Blackhawks game and then destroyed because well, I think you understand…

COMMENT: I don’t believe this is the craziest thing, so please share your crazy story with me! 🙂

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